Let's Talk, Depression...

Let's Talk about Depression for a minute. 

First off there are different levels of depression, like the Winter Blues, Post Postpartum, Situational, all the way to Deep Dark, Extremely tough to pull out of depression. 

Yes, I have experienced Every ONE of them, I don't talk about it super often because I am not trying to get sympathy or people offering ways to help me. 

I have Learned over many years of Personal Experience that something that has worked for some one else may not work for ME, but that doesn't mean there IS NOT A Solution. Just means I hadn't found one yet. 

So This post is NOT to try and pull you out of Depression necessarily, more how to Cope with it WHILE you work to get out of it. I hope that makes sense.
I guess I simply want to Share a few Ways that I have found have kept me Upbeat, Happy, and Truly feeling Well. Rather than battling my own daemons day after day.

1) Be Forgiving of YOUR Faults, not to the point you don't try to improve yourself, but to the point you recognize, we all fall short, and the only way to get better is by continuing to try. YOU are not Abnormal, or Unusual or one in a million. Many of us Live with Depression daily.

2) I beg you to do this one, READ/Listen to Personal Development, I LOVE the Book the Compound Effect (Great for Everyone)

3) REACH Out to some one you Trust, if you feel you don't have that some one, please reach out to me. I may not be able to connect with you the way a close friend would, but I can telly you I have experienced it and can give you ideas. Plus my Love to Serve and make new friends, and wont JUDGE you :)

4) Try one way small way to improve your eating habits and just keep at it (maybe eat one more serving of veggies a day, drink 100oz of water a day, cut back to only 3-5 Treats (salty or sweet) a week, cut back to one soda a day, etc...) When our Body has the proper nutrition and isn't being pumped with unhealthful foods, it can function much better and helps our mood, Promise! 

5) Daily Movement/Exercise - JUST Move, I don't care if it's 5mins a day or 60 mins, do your best to move, and start on the path to a more active life. Start slow, keep at it for 2 weeks then up the time, or intensity every couple weeks and in just 90 days you will Look back and be Surprised with your Results for SURE. 

6) Socialize - this seems to SCREAM against everything you may be feeling cause when we are depressed we want to push EVERYONE AWAY and Convince ourselves no one wants to be around us. But this simply isn't true, so reach out to a single friend or maybe a small group of friends and let them know what you are going through. Then schedule at least once a month to get out of the house and do something with those friends. :)

7) Find some one who NEEDS YOU, outside of your home. Serving others truly has been a healing part of my Depression, it helps my mind to NOT think about my problems for a couple of hours plus it helps me feel Valuable and Needed form others. 

8) Lastly ALLOW Jesus Christ into your life, he atoned for not only our sins, but our sorrows and struggles, he understand what we are battling, he knows how to heal our souls and broken wounds, even if at first it may not feel that way. Keep praying, and watching for his tender mercies in your life. THEY are there daily if we look.

My Friends I LOVE you, I KNOW this is a very difficult thing to live with, and I also know that getting through it and LIVING Life on the other side is Exhilarating and makes you feel like a total Bada** that you Fought and WON!
Keep Up the Fight and while you do, give one or more of these suggestions a try and see how much Stronger you are able to Battle Depression and NOT let it Consume your life. 

YOU GOT THIS!!!

www.sherinstark.com

LIFE...Is Bearable When You Make Your Bed

I have been wanting to BLOG for a couple weeks, but I have still been battling some depression, anxiety and parenting/marital trials and I just have NOT been sure HOW to approach this subject until this MORNING. 

I was tagged in a post from one of my fellow Coaches this morning, that gave me that Ah-Ha I KNOW what I need to say and How I NEED to approach it. Here goes....

This Summer has been thee hardest most Trying three months of my LIFE! Many of you that have followed me know many of the details but just a run down. 

If you have been following me you can skip all of this paragraph: In May my son got suspended from school, then the next week my husband took a new job that we thought would be a wonderful answer to our prayers, well 30 days later the guy turned out to be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Fired and we were without a job for Layne again. Next the first week of June my son attempted suicide and had a mental break down. Then that caused my Face to flare up in some awful rash that was blistered and swollen and miserable. Finally after all of the month of June trying to figure out all three of those things, my hubby landed another job. Not nearly as promising income wise but much more stable. July rolled around and my face was most of the way healed we finally found the right balance of meds for our son that he was doing better and things were pretty okay at that point. I went to my Beachbody Coach Annual Summit which should have been a wonderful uplifting and educational time, but I found out some traumatic stuff about a relative while I was there and that triggered my body to Shut down, and my leg and back to seize up. So I came back and was laid up in bed for 10 days. I finally began to heal from that, and then things with my business began to Fall to pieces. My Goodness can we just catch a Break (is kinda how I was beginning to feel at that point) But I also know that GOD allows us to go through things to teach us and mold us and shape us into who he want's us to be and into the Person who can Best CHANGE the World for the better. 

Obviously I left out a whole ton of details, for times sake, but you can I am sure feel and see the picture, that this all paints. 

Picture sundown time, sitting on a bench in a park during late fall when the trees only have a few stray leaves hanging on and winter could settle in at any moment. The birds have silenced their songs, it's too cold for any one else to be venturing out at the the park. The swings are still, no laughter of children. Just Still Quite and Bleak!

Well this is how my life felt, very unbearable, and still some days it does. So when I saw this video Clip here: https://youtu.be/xoQn2ZRp6Yo that my friend had tagged me in, I was so touched that my emotions were uncontrollable and the tears began to wet my cheeks and fall to the desk and my shoulders were shaking and all these emotions came flooding to the surface. 

You See, I made it a goal to make my bed daily about 18 months ago and I did for Months and Months, and then all of a sudden life seemed to overwhelming and I stopped. It's been on and off that I have made the bed for the past couple of months, so I wasn't even feeling that sense of accomplishment first thing in my day. 

But more than that, I cried because I have felt for Years (since I was a teen) that I have a HUGE calling in this life, 

*a Calling to Make the World a Better Place to Live, 

*a More Bearable, even Enjoyable Place to live and recently I have felt like "a little nothing". 

Like if I were to die tomorrow I would have a handful of friends at my funeral (heck I don't even know if my parents would attend, they didn't even attend my own wedding) but that nothing I have done in this life has been Life Altering, I wouldn't be Talked about or reminisced about, because I haven't made much of an Impact. 

However after the end of the Video I felt:

* HOPE, 

* LIGHT, 

* ENERGY, and a 

* Desire to RISE up & Change my circumstances, Stop allowing myself to wallow or feel so down in the dumps. 

I began thinking and listing off in my mind the Accomplishments I have made, the lives I have changed, or impacted. That although it might not be thousands or millions, Those who I have touched some I have helped Save their lives, change the course their life was headed in, or simply lifted up their weary heads & showed them the light or opportunity in front of them. 

I have 3 Children who I know have great things in store for them and I (Sherin) am Blessed to be their Mommy, Now that right there is HUGE. 

I started thinking of all the little things that I do daily, reading scriptures, praying, reaching out and lifting others, serving my family, serving friends, serving in my church and assisting my clients. Encouraging others to lift their eyes to God, keeping the house livable (sometimes Clean) meals cooked and kids well dressed and clean. I workout and take care of my health, I eat good foods so that I can have the Energy I need to accomplish all the little tasks. 

I realized, thanks to this video, that it's all the Little things that add up and MAKE Me Great! These things will Bless others lives, and set the example to my children and those I meet that "I am a Woman of God" and with him by my side and waking up to make my bed, Life can be Bearable, and even Joyous no matter what comes our way. 

Perspective is HUGE, and although it may seem too hard to see things any differently some days, Just start your day by rolling to your knees and giving thanks to God and Asking him for the strength to get through, then stand up and Make That Bed... You'll start out each day with a sense of accomplishment and GOD along side you fighting your battles and getting you through LIFE.

GOD Never intended this life to be Bearable on our OWN!

He intended us to have HIM along side us, Family and Friends to Encourage, Support and Cheer us along, and when we allow those things in (rather than push them away) it's kinda like we Powered up on a video Game, and we can bust through walls or jump higher and father than we could before. 

If there is anything I want you to get out of this whole thing it's this, There is NO Onetime HUGE Change that will Fix everything and make Life Bliss, it's the Small and Simple Daily steps when done with your Support System along side you, Will MAKE YOUR LIFE Bearable and Worth Living. 

www.SherinStark.com

WOMEN... STOP Playing the Comparison GAME!

We all KNOW that Social Media is Creating Monsters, allowing for Bullying, Causing us to Compare our lives to Others, waste time scrolling and liking scrolling and liking without ever really engaging with our friends, etc....

But did you also know there are always two sides to the Coin???

Social Media can also be a HUGE blessing, helping us to Stay connect with friends and family we couldn't otherwise, or  allowing us to support friends going through a rough patch, we can use it to share what works for us and what products we love, and many of us have also chosen to USE it to Build a Business. 

Something that's been HUGE on my mind lately is this:
Just because we Choose to Work from home and Build a business online does NOT mean we work less hard, or it's a "pretend" Career, that we should be ignored, mocked, or teased for doing.  

For some reason I have been noticing Work from Home Women being bullied by other parents who are Work out of the home parents or Stay at home parents.

I have seen my dear friends feel this and have it happen to them and I personally have a handful of times. 

WE are all WOMEN, Doing what we feel is BEST for our Families. We should NEVER be tearing each other down, apart, or back talking to others about why one way of choosing to live is better than another. 

NOT all of us WANT to be working from home, but we simply see no other option, Child care is too expensive and so working out of the home is not an option, and not working leaves us not being able to make ends meet. So we do our best with what we can, find what we are passionate about and Run with it. I LOVE that this is even an option for so many women these days.

Lately personally I have been feeling Lonely, feeling like the More I read personal development and try to better myself the less people want to associate with me. especially stay at home mom's and work from home moms. Almost like they think I think I am better or above them.

I do not feel that way and if YOU are reading this and think I am feeling this way towards you, NO I am not. More than anything I am feeling a HUGE burden to help Support our Family from drowning in debt and not enough money to make ends meet monthly, that I am trying my best to hold my emotions together, put the pedal to the medal and grow a business that allows us to cover the necessary costs of living. 

So Please Mamma's 
LOVE eachother 
BUILD one another up
LAUGH together (not at each other)
CRY, VENT, and DUMP on each other as you talk things through
MAKE time to be a Friend the way the Savior Would.

and NEVER try to hurt, cause pain, or say snide words, you never ever know if that could be the last straw on their back that breaks them.

Follow the Golden Rule, Do Unto Others as you would have Done Unto You. 
Even if you aren't a fan of what they do as their career, you can still LOVE, Like, and compliment them on their accomplishments.  

Remember LIFE isn't a Competition against others it's a Competition against ourselves from yesterday, are we improving our lives today over how we were yesterday, that's it. 

So if you have found yourself doing any comparing to others, bullying, name calling, etc.... I BEG You to STOP and Make this World a little easier to live in for all of us.

-Sherin 

www.sherinstark.com